Find Your ‘Why’ in 3 Steps

Do you know why you’re doing what you’re doing?

It’s easy to get caught up in the daily grind and find yourself simultaneously in the thick of it and nowhere at all. But it doesn’t have to be that way. If you consider the why behind what you’re doing, you’ll home in on what matters and cut out the stuff that doesn’t. That’s Healthy Selfish in action.

Better yet, finding your why doesn’t have to be a grind in and of itself. You can keep it simple. Here’s how to do it in three steps:

1) Build a Foundation

Asking yourself, “Why am I doing this?” is crucial, whether you’re thinking about building something from scratch or expanding what already exists.

Here’s the secret: sometimes your first answer isn’t your most honest answer. Or even your only answer. That brings me to step two.

2) Take a Step Back

Take a second to reflect on whether what you’re saying really feels true. If it doesn’t, keep digging.

Your why must drive everything you do. It will need to carry you through rough moments and unexpected hardships. So even if you’ve got an answer, don’t be afraid to step back and think about it more. Will a few more free hours each day or more money get you out of bed each morning?

If the answer is no (which it probably is), you have more work to do.

3) Reflect on What Fuels You

When you’re trying to find your why, an important part of the process is asking yourself the right questions. Maybe for you, “What is my why?” is an easy question to answer. It wasn’t for me. With that in mind, here are some of the questions that helped me:

  • What am I passionate about?
  • What gets me fired up?
  • What do I want people to say about me at my funeral?
  • What kinds of actions and beliefs do I want to pass on to my children?

Once you’ve got some notes down, try to find the themes or patterns in your answers. Don’t be afraid to revisit your why if things start to feel a little jumbled. That’s what I had to do. My why for building a team started with wanting more time to spend with my family, but that wasn’t the whole answer. Eventually, I realized I wanted to show up everywhere with heart. And when I identified that, I could infuse it into everything I did.

When you put in the work and pause to reflect, everything becomes a whole lot clearer. And when you make sure your why matches your actions, everything will begin to feel more stable.